Help! Windows 7 - can't login or use safe mode

Forewarning, I'm a bit of an idiot about precise computer terminology so please use plain speak when you answer this thread.

I've got an acer aspire with windows 7 and when I am logging in through normal mode I get the message "The User Profile Service service failed the logon. User profile cannot be loaded." .. I tried a reset and a full shut down + boot up to no avail so I tried to start in safe mode. The first two times I attempted it I got a string of 5 obnoxious beeps, but if I hold it down it will beep infinitely, longest I waited was almost 30 beeps but safemode still does not load, just boots up to normal mode which won't login.
F2 and F12 setup were useless to me, but F12 beeps in the sameway when I press it on startup, except that it loads.
If I could just boot it to last working config or get into safe mode and run some scans .. I dunno?
What is this and should I call my mechanic?

*Note this labtop is fairly old and has had one hard drive replacement in it's life but had been otherwise functional
Please help /:

 

Hi, PieNaple. Welcome to Major Geeks,

When you got the computer, did you make a Recovery CD? This would allow you to repair Windows.

 

Gosh that was ages ago, if I had, it is long gone. I think I've actually resolved the issue though. It was a glitch in the settings save from my last log out. Very minor. I've managed to restore to last working config.
I actually didn't have a seperate admin account to work from so one had to be imported!
Thank you for your effort though.