So now we Know

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Wenchie, Jan 20, 2005.

  1. Wenchie

    Wenchie I R teh brat

    Four hours of testing and questions later, it's official.

    ADHD with Articulation and Auditory Delay, Gross Motor Dysfunction

    Recommendations for Speach Therapy, Occupational Therapy (it's different for Kids) and Physical Therapy, as well as Family counciling for both Kay and Myself, In home support, and surgery to remove the tonsils and raise the uvula to bring kahlyns voice out of her nasal cavity and promote clarity.

    Auditory Dysfunction means that information enters Kays mind and scatters like ashes in the wind. She responded minimally or not at all to verbal cues and directive, But she's "high average" at visual responsiveness, as long as she isnt asked to make connection of concept between to objects or pictures. Meaning she's very smart, but nothing can get in to nourish that. And she's almost completely incapable of understanding all but very basic speech.

    The worst part is that they think that not only is she ADHD but her symptoms were aggravated by emotional trauma due to the repeated appearence and reappearence of her father, whom she showes unnatural devotion too and whose presence COULD HAVE contributed largly to her ability to catch up if he'd decided to interact, but his inconsistancy damaged her ability to adjust and then coupled with her disability made everything she was already plagued with 10 times worse.

    Well... Duh. I told him it was in or out and this constant in and out was damaging her but he didnt listen to me then, so he wont care now and I'm not even going to bother to tell her. If he'd just been there for her she'd have been alot more likely to adjust.

    It makes me mad for two reasons. A. What was so hard about it, she is wonderful B. It's all my fault because I tried to get him involved when I should have just let him leave her after she was born like he tried to. Being raised catholic, I thought it was important for a father to raise his dauhter, and now i see what a crock that was. And it hurt her irrepatbly and its all my fault :(

    So... I just wanted to tell everyone what they found. I know for a long time some of you have been waiting to hear what the diagnosis was going ot be,. Now we know.. Now we can go from here.

    Love you all
     
  2. Kodo

    Kodo SNATCHSQUATCH

    Well, Well.. I'm happy that there is some closure to Kays' life. Now, hopefully it's going only get better now that you know what the deal is. Good luck Kay :) we're rooting fer ya :p
     
  3. gal1998

    gal1998 solo-cob

    I am glad you got a diagnosis and can go on from there. Therapy can work wonders.


    Please don't blame yourself. You tried to do what is right and no one can fault you for that. Not even yourself.

    Look to the future!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Good luck and take care.

    Gal
     
  4. G.T.

    G.T. R.I.P February 4, 2007. You will be missed.

    Correction Wenchie: It's HIS fault, not yours. Children DO do better with 2 active, stable, involved parents, which was what you were striving for. You held up your end of the deal. Hindsight is always 20/20.
     
  5. martinch

    martinch Specialist

    You did the right thing to try and involve him in your daughters life,many mothers do just the opposite. It is his fault that he didnt take the chance to know and love his child.
     
  6. BLAJY

    BLAJY Corporal

    How old is your daughter? My nephew has ADHD. He showed symptoms as early as 2yrs. of age. He is now in middle school and his behaviour has improved dramatically. He basically was "out of control" 20x's or more a day. His parents were usually spent by the end of the day. Very bright in the areas he is interested in, and he has an unbelievable imagination.

    The most important thing is to utilize all the services the schools have to offer. They won't offer any extra need help, so stay on them and basically demand the services you want, if needed.The law requires it. Speech, Remedial Reading,a classroom aide(my nephews aide sat with him, just to make sure he stayed on task).

    Have them write up a PPT early in Sept. Make sure all teachers and non-academic teachers(music,art,gym),and extra help professonals show up. Go prepared, with printed information on ADHD, and hand each person one. Not all teachers are fully aware on how to handle students with ADHD, and often label them"trouble makers".

    Best of luck,the road does get easier as they get older. :)
     
  7. eclayton

    eclayton Sgt. Shorts-cough

    Yes, please don't blame yourself, that is simply looking backwards to things you can't change. Look forward. Now that you have some definite diagnosis, you can work to remedy the situation. And while Kay does need a father (as GT said) blaming yourself won't change anything. Look FORWARD to what you CAN do now, and seek to keep growing. Kay's gonna be alright. :)
    We are grateful that we know you, Renate. Thanks for sharing your life with us here. You and Kay are in our prayers.
    Eric
     
  8. DavidGP

    DavidGP MajorGeeks Forum Administrator - Grand Pooh-Bah Staff Member

    Totally agree with what gal1998 said above, you both have been through a tough time.. but now with answers you can start planning a brighter future for the two of you.

    :)
     
  9. Phantom

    Phantom Brigadier Britches

    As has been said, the first step to treating a problem is to first know what it is. I had (still have) a son with A.D.H.D. We got all sorts of bull from the 'experts' who tried to us it was bad parenting etc. At least the condition is much more widely recognized now.

    No point blaming yourself, or beating yourself up over anything. You did the best you possibly could under the circumstances, just as we did for our kids. We can do no more, and no less. At least you can now take the necessary steps to ensure Kahy's optimum development.

    Ah life, full of obstacles, but full of rewards also, I guess. Just seems as though the bad always sticks in out heads more than the positive.
     
  10. Colemanguy

    Colemanguy MajorGeek

    I actually have been diagnosed with adhd but am now very well employeed and doing extermly well for my self. So don't worry to much it will be a tough trip but in the end everything we be ok.
     

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