Girls.

I know it's a common topic but with a twist...

In my case, I have a list of very nice girls except ( I say no to sex (intercourse)) I am 17 and I don't really want a g/f since I don't really want to well disappoint her if ya know what I mean. I don't have my license and i'm a Senior. I really don' tknow what to do does anyone have an idea??

 

You could try speaking English...

 

Uh I do speak English but in my case I really don't well kinda don't want a g/f since well I really don't know its fishy.

 

I'm confused...

what exactly is the problem?

 

Nope. sorry. I still don't understand quite what the question is. I'm probably too old.

 

If you don't want a girlfriend... then don't have one.

 

What do I do. Do I go out with a girl and be worried if I'm doing the right thing since I can't drive or nothing <-- getting license in winter. And does the pros over load the cons I have had a g/f before but we had to break up.

 

LOLOL that made me laugh.

Nah.. I don't understand it either lol

 

Except I do want a girlfriend except at my age, all the girls are all looking at your wallet and your driveway. They all want sex. Its so irrelevant I just want a girl to take care of not to yea u know. Its fishy I don't but I do at the same time.

 

I'd give it a few years if I were you.

 

I'll do my best except my testostrone doesn't agree with what u said stupid male hormones.

 

If you're looking for advice....I say, "just relax!" Sure, go out with girls. But if they're just looking at your wallet, driveway or zipper, don't sweat it. Ask someone else out. You're young, don't rush into a relationship. The right will come along eventually.

 

Awesome. Yea I'm a tense worry alot dude. Eek does anyone know how to relax. I know it sounds silly but well in my situation its foreign to my kind of mind set. yea know

 

Take up a hobby. Like smoking.

 

Smoking what?

 

Air. Duh.

 

Yes... lets all rot our lungs and get cancer.

Great idea

(i'm just joking around with you!!)

 

OH!!! AIR! Right....Gotcha...... *Runs away*

 

Isn't it!?

Oh joy! I'm giddy with anticipation.

 

Gott...you slay me..ROTFLMAO

 

I'm sure if Phantom were here, he'd reply with something along the lines of "har!"

 

Tell you what you need to do :
http://www.youthofbritain.com/chillout/

 

Let me get something straight, you are 17 and you said all the girls just look at your wallet and driveway and just want sex? Are these girls 30 or something? because normal 17 yr old girls aren't like that.

If you arent sure if you want to have a gf but you do, then just casually go out with girls as friends, or with a group of friends, but dont be tied down to just one girl.
You have to remember, you are only 17, you are just starting out in the dating thing, having a gf at your age isnt all that important, you will have plenty of time to date and so forth, so dont be in a hurry to think you should have a gf, if you dont want one, then dont have one. And for the not driving, so what, again, you are only 17, stop trying to think you need to have everything now, you don't.

 

Sounds to me like you need to figure out how to be comfortable with yourself. You are looking at the wrong things, such as wallet, car, etc. If you learn to like yourself, you will probably learn to relax, and then you will meet girls who are aren't so shallow that all they look at is exterior things like money, cars, etc.

Improve yourself first. Work on learning things. Read lots of classic novels. Watch good movies. Learn some skills such as carpentry, or electrical. Learn to play a new musical instrument. Volunteer at the homeless shelter. Get involved with Life, and then, as you are living, you will learn who YOU are, and then meet someone who you like, and who likes you in return just as you are. And then, don't stop learning. Keep learning until you are on your death bed. Then you will look back at a life well-lived, and shared with people you love, and you will leave a legacy behind worth talking about.

I think you should also learn how to communicate. Learn how to zero in on what is going on inside you, put names to the feelings, and then learn to put that into words. Your first couple of posts were extremely hard to understand. There's no way to have a relationship with a person of the opposite sex, or anyone for that matter, until you can learn to communicate.

So, you have your work cut out for you, but don't we all? Let's get busy living and learning!

Eric

 

...Sounds more like wishful thinking to me.


...Or maybe I'm just getting too old as well?

 

@ Gott:- take up a hobby like the ART of smoking? Why not?- Works for me for the past 25 years!

Oh yeah - HAR!!!

 

Excellent advice. Decide what and who you want to be first, not what you need to be/have to attract a girl.

 

Awesome advice you guys thank you so much. Yea I need to read more except I really don't know how to buckle down and just read. Since I get distracted really easily I well don't know how to. Does anyone have any suggestions on how I can better myself at reading. I would really appreciate the recommendations.

Thanx. .

 

Thank You very much for this long reply. I do need to look for myself since well, I am not secure with my own self. I'll do my best on that part on reading. Right now i'm reading upon Windows Programming since I like reading about that kinda stuff but i need to buckle down and read some cool titles. Does anyone know about some really awesome titles where you couldn't put that book down for just one second. I read the Jungle and that was an awesome book about the meat factory and how people were trying to make a living in America. Awesome!!

 

GOLDFISH!!!! Hey!!! Haven't seen you on here for awhile. How have you been?

 

Listen up kid. I don't have time to spend in here today so you'll just have to deal with one time advice. Back away from the girl. If she is pressuring you for intimate moments, then she is not the one for you. Education is the most important thing in your life right now. Girlfriends are nice to have, but they must respect you, your future and herself. If she is willing to go that far with you, then she is not respecting herself or your future. Run!!! Find a gal who has not interest in sex right now. One that can focus on the big picture....a future.

Now, I must run. I have to leave soon as my laundry is almost done. When I come back in a week, I hope to see a thread titled "I Dumped The Gal".

@ Lugz, you gave good advice in this thread. Make sure you follow you own advice.

 

Yea I had parent problems when I was around 15 so I have been going to a psychologist and taking meds to get myself back for what I have lost for the past 15 years. I just received my permit this march and I'm going to go take driver's edu (most likely) this Sept. Actually I don't have a g/f except I have lots of potential girls who are actually alright. I crossed out most of them since there not my type and also who really are just in it for my physical appearance and my popularity. I just can't stand shallow girls and I want to highten my abilities/ knowledge to know when to run away or to give the gal a second shot.

Thanx u guys .

 

Well I read today. I actually like it. I believe because of your post, it changed my mind on reading. Thank You soo very very much. I'll ask my step dad if he'll show me how to meditate. I believe that's a good relaxing tool.

 

I hear that except, I talked with my parents and such and their input was don't get serious with a girl but the more you get exposed to the opposite sex in such away (b/f ....... g/f) <-- not so close but still like 1 month maybe 2 relationship time period, the more experience you'll gain about the opposite sex. Ya know where I'm kinda coming from, but yea that's what my parents recommended to me.

 

Take your time, don't worry about it. Don't pursue what isn't there. And don't ever try to figure out a women your wasting your time, men and women are from different planets we are to each other strange creatures.

 

Don't worry about it. OOOO I love that line Thank you grist You have been a very huge help!! Damn I think i'll just repeat that line again Don't worry about it. OO THat's an awesome line!

 

Very cool!! And you are very welcome! If you are needing a good book to read, and aren't that good at reading, I suggest Treasure Island for a good classic to get started in. It's by Robert Louis Stevenson, and my dad read it to me when I was a kid, and I've read it many times since, and I read it to my wife Cindy. I plan on reading it to my kids someday too. It's a great adventure story, very good classic literature, yet very easy to follow and fun to read. Give it a shot!!

I'm very encouraged that you're sharing here. There's lots of cool folks that will be glad to give you a listening ear, and maybe some advice too!

Have a good day, take care, let us all know how things go!!

Eric

 

With due respect to your parents...

and the girl thinks it's more "serious" than you do -- how do you "break up?"
and you get in a situation that you didn't want to get in -- then what?
and you feel too pressured -- how do you deal with that?

EXPERIENCE? - FIRST "know thyself" -- which is what everyone else has said.
SECOND -- find another couple of guys or girls (and it shouldn't be an equal number) who feel like you do. The best way to gain EXPERIENCE about girls and to KNOW yourself is not to be put in an artificial dating environment (few people act like their "real" selves) but to be in a real friendship environment.

3 guys, 2 girls go bowling.
2 guys, 3 girls go to the pool.
3 guys, 4 girls go to the movies. ETC.

Watch and observe -- what qualities in yourself and others do you like?
What personality traits drive you crazy?
What do you want to change in yourself?
What type of girl do you start to find yourself attracted to? -- keep those ideas in the back of your head...because (most likely) you won't be marrying one of them this year.

Don't set yourself or anyone else up for a heartache. Just have fun. Dating seems like fun -- can be fun while it lasts -- but when it ENDS - and it will - it's not fun.

Going to all the same events with a bunch of friends ("group dating") but not zeroing in on ONE person ---- all the fun, no heartache.

I can say this because I did it during high school and college and when I got married I could truly say "Today, I married my friend." We were friends FIRST and hung out with the same group of FRIENDS for a year and then....hey, we started dating (but we were 22 years old.)

 

Pegg you hit some really good points about the group hanging out and stuff. And yea I had to break up with the gal because well some unpleasant things happened which well I don't really want to go into that part right now but yea parents wanted me to break up with her. Since it was being cool with the parents or have the girl but be kicked out of the house. I chose the being cool wtih the parents. With that I broke up with her. It's all good but yea, I'm just wondering on if I actually should go and try it again ya know. Just casually ya know. I wouldn't mind actually to just well go out with a girl casually but not get to serious but I don't know know if it's the right thing or should I keep focused in school at all times and not try get cool with the women. I don't know what are your guy's opinion on this.

 

No such thing as "just casually" if you're going to call it a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship (my opinion). And what if "too serious" means one thing to you but something different to her?

See? Too complicated. Enjoy school. Enjoy friends. Have fun, play sports, get involved in other pursuits (like slider said), think FUN - having a girlfriend is not the only way (or even A way to have fun). And I'm a "girl" so...

Re-read everyone's posts from the beginning. Copy and paste them into a document, print them out and read them again.

 

Sounds fishy to me too.

 

Ah okay AwesOmE!!! Thanx Pegg I believe that's well enough posts for that since well, I'll just be myself just like last year and enjoy myself and do what ever the heck I please. Dang that felt good when I typed that last sentence woot!!! . I'll make friends and coo stuff like that. I'm reading everyone!!! I'm actually proud of myself that I said that. DAmn that was .

 

I thought it was the other way around....


hmmmm

 

Yeah Right.....

I think Dande might be on to something here. If they are over 30, send me their names right away. I'll send you my opinion in a few weeks after I've intensively interviewed them as to their motives.

 

I grew up in the hippie days and had more women and sex by the time I was twenty then most have in a lifetime. I don't mean that as a brag it was just the times. If I had it to do all over again.... well I'd do it the same
But againlike I said beforeDON"T WORRY ABOUT IT just go on with your life as you see fit. If a certain aspect of life that's out there isn't part of your life so what. You have things others don't. We are not created equal per say. We (you) are individuals, don't follow the beaten path, make your own path and leave a trail

 

Hey there! Sorry to go a little O.T. but I'm doing good Just recently got back from Wales.... Llandanwg! Bachgen bach! lol! And I've got a TAN!!! Waaw!

And also, pegg, the uneven numbers, a simple concept which has completley evaded me for a few years! Could have saved me some rather embaressing moments...

 

Man if you watched as much P**N as I have, you would be sick of sex. lol. P**N is actually good for you since if you watched it enough times its well, boring and irrelevant. and I'm only 17!!!!

 

Thank You Grist on your opinion on just be yourself. Go with your instincts and if your mind goes off the beaten path, continue on that path. Who cares what other people say, who made them king of the jungle ya know. Thank you Very much Grist .

 

....i'm not even going to comment....

i'm just going to use this emoticon to sum up what I am thinking

 

lol hey it works I can't complain.