now comes the scarey part

I've been reading the posts on here for a long time now and never thought I'd be putting my own up. Like an other person on here (Gary I think ) life has delt a blow to me.Now the challenge begins .In about 2 1/2 hours I go in for my first of many chemo treatments. I'm not really looking forward to them but my Dr. says they will add about a year onto my life. I'm having 2nd thoughts as to if I want it extended or not. I've lived my life and now it's time to go. I've raised my kids to be the best they can be and they proved to me thay are the best. I'm proud of them and don't want to interfer in their daily lives. Love is such a hard word for me to say. It isn't the way I was raised and I have tried my best. 2 hours and 20 minutes . The outcome is what I'm afraid of . The chances of my passing on are great. and I feel as thou I losing my mind as time moves closer to the mark. Keeping busy is all I can think of doing right now.
If all goes ok I will tell you how it felt and what the outcome may be.

 

Hey obnoxious...sorry to hear you are up against the "C", but don't lose hope. Sixty isn't old - you should not give up this fight easily. If it were one of your kids going through it, I'm sure you would encourage and fight with them all the way to victory. OK, so some cancers cannot be overcome, but you gotta give it your best shot and see where it takes you. We never know the outcome of any decisions we make, but put one foot forward, test the water, and see where it takes you.

Hang in there...prayers and positive thinking going up for you *hugs*.

 

I'm a two-time cancer survivor and I just want to tell you not to give up. The chemo will be hard but stay positive and you can get through it. I beleive in the power of the mind and it's healing potential.

I wish you the best of luck on your treatment. Keep telling yourself you're going to get through this and you will.

 

Dont give up that easily, miracles can happen and you should always be hopeful of the outcome and if it doesnt go the way you expected, then you can say to yourself that you tried. Theres an old saying that the children should be the ones to bury their parents, not the other way around.

 

When its your time to go, you'll go. Until then, fight with everything you have. Spend time with those you love and those that love you.

 

I have to agree with most of what has been said previously.
I am so sorry this has happened to you. Please have a positive attitude. That can sometimes do more than the therapy can.
My thoughs and prayers are with you

 

I am 50 years old, and lost my mother recently. I can state that your kids need you more than you think. Lean on them, this is what family is for.

Feel free to vent, this is what we're here for.

Mostly, hang in there. If you are a believer put your faith in God, if you aren't it might be time to start. Can't hurt, might help, to paraphrase Pascal.

 

Well I made it through the scarey part almost ok. One thing I read in the pamphlet was that I am to avoid any situation that can cause injury to myself. The chemo destroys the cells that also protect your body against infections leaving a person defensless to fight infection. When I got home ,the first thing I did was pet my cat and frightened her out of a sleep and she got me. It took about 3 hour to stop the bleeding DUH! ?smart? me dumdass cancer no chance.
Over the past 5 years I've had more than my share of IV's but this one scared the crap out of me cause it was a man made chemical derived from the foaming remants of leftover draino and I dont want and never had any use for manemade chemicals to be put into my body. I've never had nor tried any Methamphetamine. bet you didn't think I could spell it ,did you?
I got such a bad attitude the Doctor hasnt stopped laughing yet and I saw him last Friday.
My first opinion was ,I have 6 months to 1 1/2 years to live. yea right
The second opinion was I have 6 months to live. 1 1/2 years with chemo. which one needs a new BMW? I'm going to make fakers out of them both and live a long assed somewhat happy life even if I can't breath .
sorry for taking up all your time but I wont be here that often to rant on. Being single and living almost alone with no one to talk to is undescriable {words depleted}. thanks for listening to my ramblings. I'll be ok now until next week when I got through the same thing only longer and with more chemicals added . hope my hair don't fall out, i wont be handsome no more. darn

 

to TimW
yes all hair falls out ,so you are a little boy again. you get to go thru puberty again except stay away from little girls this time around.
My pulminary/crical care Doctor learned his practice in Syria at Damascus U.
My family Doctor (which I see every 3 months) was trained at Damascus U. in Syria.
My chemo Doctor was trained in Egypt and got his diploma only 4 years ago.
My previous Doctor was an Iranian but he now practices in New Symira Beach ,Florida.
The doctor I had Before him was an American and he quit practicing doctoring.
So my question to you is should I eat the chicken pot pie or just settle for the white castle burgers (ha,ha,ha) I had for supper?

 

gentlemen save on not buying shaving needs and less deodorant, but lose on buying head wax.

 

Sounds like we have had the same doctors. My primary doctor I have now has a Fisher Price stethoscope. Twice I was told all they could do was treat my condition as it flared. Twice I happened in a different direction and found there was more then just treatment. There are so many people who were given a time period and are still going strong. New procedures coming up all the time. My children is what kept me on board. You've heard the saying, "no matter what your relationship is with your parents, you'll miss them when they're gone". So true, lost my mother. we were not close, at times I still feel like screaming. Sorry your alone at a time like this, you've got us. Don't know if you believe in prayer but I'll be putting in a word for you. (HANG!)

 

If you're still hungry, eat the chicken pot pie, definitely.

If you can scarf down Sliders after chemo, you're doing pretty well with it so far.

Don't believe everything the doctors tell you. Mine told me all of my hair would fall out, and while most body hair disappeared, I never did lose all of it on top, although it did get a lot thinner. Lately it's been coming back some. (shrug) You can check out my profile picture; it's about a month old or so. All of the things I'm taking have long lists of "potential side effects", most of them fairly depressing; most of them I haven't experienced. It ain't fun, but it ain't as bad as it could be.

I'm supposed to be "terminal" too, although my doctor is honest enough to tell me he doesn't KNOW how long I've got. Different folks react differently, both to the cancer and to the treatments. In some ways, it would be nice to have a target date, but in either case, we can only take life a day at a time.

A lot of folks will encourage you to fight to the very last, no matter what. I don't buy that. Quality of life is more important to me than the number of days left. That doesn't mean I don't do all I can, and intend to enjoy whatever I can enjoy, but it DOES mean that beyond a certain point I don't intend to fight. If/when I get to the point where I can't do anything except lay in a bed, I don't care to prolong things "at any cost". To me, that's not living, and I'd rather bow out and move on to the next world. Hopefully not TOO soon. There are still things I'd like to do before I leave.

I live alone too, and all my family is long distance, but I do have some good friends and neighbors, which is a comfort. If you ever want to talk outside the forum, drop me a PM.

If anybody DOES have any good cancer jokes, I'd enjoy hearing them. There don't seem to be too many out there.

I DID tell the gal that works next to me that if they let us dress up for Halloween, I'd like to come as the Grim Reaper. She squeeled and told me not to TALK like that. LOL.

 

I take my days 2 at a time as 1 doesn't do the job for me. I retired in 1999 from one of the auto plants and trying to keep up with the changes to my insurance is worse than any old disease that is available. The day I walked out the door was the last day I've been able to enjoy anything .It is one hell of a battle but I wont let it get me down I'm fighting it as best as I can and together we will win Gary.
To Lev--- my age maybe sixty but my mind is 29, And when I get out to Oregon again watch out for me I was out there in 1965 -1966 in the area of the Pacific Northwest. Lewis and Clark country was beaten into my skull so much.I resided in Astoria on the Tongue Point.One of Gods countries.
To Darlene (Darling)
where I live the hospitals have an open door policy for new or just learning foreign doctors. They are so dumb too. an example = Doc asks why I'm there to see him?" I said because of the cancer." Looking at the file he says" how did you get it?" I looked at him and said "how do you think I got it? I live in Port Huron, St Clair county, cancer capital of the world. Now how do you think I got it?
20 minutes later he stopped laughing long enuf to finish the interview.

 

Yep, sounds like the same medical staff. One place had 3 files on me by misspelling my name, then they disappeared all together, so did I. Seeing a new doctor next month. I know what you mean about the insurance, that alone can kill ya.

 

Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

-Dylan Thomas

I always find that insperational so Rage, rage obnoxious

 

TimW - Think theres such a thing as cancer jokes??

 

http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&lr=&q=cancer+jokes

[This was sent by a cancer patient and shows how a spouse with humor can lighten the stress of diagnosis and treatment. Has your spouse come up with good retort? Let us know.]

So how about this for you single guys

http://knitting.about.com/

 

Your right thats funny