Street People

Street people at one time had families, a life, jobs, children. Myself I try to look at street people as being ill. I realize a lot, most, of them are drug addicts and alcoholics but maybe thats what they have to do in order to function. Function to the degree for them to survive.
I have always handed some poor soul what little change I might have on me. You pronely think thats stupid because they'll buy liquor but I see it as if thats what they need to stop the voices or whatever anguish they're experiencing then let them.
My grandmother told me when I was a child God tests us in many ways. Could be a bum asking for a handout.

My other reason is my son, my first born who I have not seen or heard from in years is possibly one of those people. There is nothing a family can do to get help for them. He had a wife raised 2 children was a good provider then one day snapped, not violent but saying crazy stuff that scared his wife. He went for mental evaluation and was diagnosed as having some kind of mental disorder. He would not admit it and refused medication insisting it was drugs so that was that. He lost his family. He even claims his name is something other then what it is. He doesn't think I'm his mother, it's heart breaking.
I did see his picture in a paper a few years back and contacted the reporter by email just to say what a relief it was to see him.
While he was in mental health a worker from there told me over the phone to forget him, go on with my life. I was furious, thought that woman had no business in that profession. As it turns out she, no matter how harsh it was, knew what she was talking about. What with human rights and all you can not force a person to take medication or receive treatment if they don't want it.
Which is odd being one of the signs of mental illness is that they don't realize it themselves.
Ronald Reagen I believe when he was governor of California closed most all the mental facilities and put them out on the streets. Personally I believe he suffered form Alzheimer as a sort of retribution.

My son was also in the military, Army Airborne.

Just think the next time you see someone who disgusts you on the street, they were once a part of a family. A family who will forever love, miss and worry about them but who are helpless.

God look after you my son.

 

Thanks for sharing that on Memorial Day weekend, Darlene. I hope your son has or will eventually reach out for the help he needs. Some do, some don't.
I also do give change when asked, if I have it. I do it, because I know the guy asking could be a Vet. A lot of homeless are. Viet Nam Vets and Vets in general, have a very high rate of homelessness, drug problems, mental issues, and health issues.
I suffered from depression and PTSD for years, still do at times. Even at my worst times, I have known others who were far worse off than me and I always felt sympathy towards them.
There's not a lot you can do when someone doesn't want help. A have a very good friend (Viet Nam helicoptor gunner) that is an alcoholic, suffers from depression, PTSD, has diabetes, and was homeless on top of that. He panhandled for booze money, wouldn't take help from the many people who offered it. He wintered in the mission here and summered outdoors. Eventually, with the support of a lot of us, he got signed up for SSID, got himself a subsidized apartment, still panhandles, drinks and refuses any help mental health help. But it's a step.

 

Hugs to you all

 

Darlene’s story is heartbreaking and more common place than most of us ever realise.

Many families are affected by these sort of circumstances world wide. In this day and age where all of us a constantly bombarded with you just gotta have this or do this, we lose sight of our compassion for each other as human beings.

Darlene, you just have to hold onto the knowledge that you did your best by him, yes life goes on without your loved one, forgetting is not possible, going on without them is difficult, the helpless feeling rarely goes away no matter what length of time passes. Continuing to help others in whatever small way you can is the best way to ease the heartache you feel.

Regards from Oz - Ann

 

Friend has a brother somewhat in same situation, nobody knows what happened to him...alcholol was his downfall. Has not been heard from for years but yes I think it was Regan that cut mental health programs. Also, some don't want to be in a facility even if available - would rather be on the street, they don't think/know there is a problem to deal with. We had a homeless woman that lived in the doorway of an office building downtown, would not stay in a program just kept coming back to the street. Yes, she was ill but unless kept against her will, she was free to leave the program. Not much you can do unless declared incompetent by state and hard to do. Test is really lame IMO.

On a brighter note, some get it together and show up years later had a highschool friend that just showed up a year ago (took drugs) and she is doing well now, she had just took off to FL for 15 years!

 

Darlene Your words will always make me think whenever someone asks for change or money.

"There But for the Grace of God go I."

Not my words, I ain't that smart.

Thanks Darlene. And peace to you and yours

E

 

Thanks paramonks,Cat and Fred

 

A guy came up to me today, I would say in his 40's, wanting money to feed his family. (supposedly, I don't know.) He wanted $10. Kinda rich for me...

I talked to him for a bit, he said he wanted the money to feed his family. I asked him what he would buy. He said ground beef. Not the best choice in my opinion for cheap eats. I asked him how he would cook it. He said he had a place to stay, so he could cook.

Dang you Darlene! I gave him some cash. Not 10$, but enough to eat on for a while, or get a buzz.

A few bucks will not make or break me. I hope he was honest and used it for food.

E

 

Sorry, at least your intentions were good. Ever heard the old saying, kill em all and let God sort it out? In other words he would be the only one to know the truth.
Funny thing too is my son was never sympathetic to people, say down on they're luck.

 

Dar...
That truly is a touching story, and I have debated about what I am about to post. Understand that there is no malice or anything in what I am abou to say, just frustration at the information contained therein.

We have a group of 'homeless vets' here in Central NY. If you drive around the city enough, you know where they are and watch them trade off occasionally (Herald/Franklin; West/Fayette, West/Shonnard, 690/Hiawatha and the list goes on). Several years ago, I was working at the Veterans Hospital locally and came across one of these people. Curiosity got the better of me and I looked into the situation wondering if there was something I could do to help these Homes and hungry vets. To my surprise and dismay, it turns out that there is a regular 'crew' of 10-15 people who live comfortably on their pensions, they actually own a couple of homes where they all live, but instead of getiing a job, they drive into the city each morning (most recently in an '03-ish Chevy SUV) and spread out to blk the hardworking and honest poeple of their cash.

While I agree with the sentiment behind Dar's story, it's harder to see it in real life when you come across stuff like that.

I'll keep your family in the thoughts Dar.... hope that someday things can work out and he can be back in your lives again in a good way.

~C

 

Thank you CT, yes I know there are people who make a comfortable living panhandling. There was a school I saw on tv years ago teaching the ways. Also saw on one of those shows 20 20, or whatever it was, where they followed with camera, a beggar to his car which was a BMW.
I'm not even sure my son is on the streets doing that. I do know he lost his home, his family, did not work and was staying with his sister and her family until they moved out of state then no one knew what happened to him until we saw the picture in the paper. It was an article about a center for Veterans was being shut down leaving those staying there homeless, my son being one.
All he had left to his name was his van with some clothes, when he went to jail for a few weeks and lost that also. Being homeless is considered suspicious and putting them in jail until they decide whether to charge them is common practice. A person at the jail also thought it wrong and blamed Ronald Regan.

 

Within around 10 years he went from kissing his sleeping son to carring a bed roll

http://i211.photobucket.com/albums/bb187/Darlene1029/Rickkissinghissonsleepingonhim.jpg

http://i211.photobucket.com/albums/bb187/Darlene1029/Rick9-9-04.jpg

 

There is always hope Darlene, you never know ... sometimes a person hits bottom and swims to the shore.

 

Thanks, for all I know he's happy. It may be me thats having such a hard time with it.

 

Hi Darlene a really touching story and insight to a family's view of these people on the streets.

as quoted by Fred "there but for the grace of god go i"

Muskies point over vets having problems is also very valid.

my story has been aired here earlier and i would not bore you all with it again but my problems started when i left the military, i hit the booze and got myself into a real mess, eventually i got help (some say too late) and got myself back to reality.

here in the city of Brugge we do not see people on the street looking for handouts, i do not know why? maybe it is to do with this being a tourist city and the police stop them.

we do get musicians playing in the street for change but that's all.

i do hope you can find peace Darlene and thanks for sharing your story hopefully it will soften some hearts toward the homeless.

 

I live in the ghetto and see bums everyday

If i can afford it i will hook them up with a couple ciggerettes or change, or buy them something to eat, but thats only if i can. Im trying to survive myself just got laid off my job and our economy sucks, so that last dollar in my pocket is going to a double cheeseburger for me not some bum, i had to work for it. Their are labor places that offer daily jobs that i used to work at for low paying wages but atleast your not asking for handouts and working for your money.

But hey I hear bums can make good money panhandling now a days
probuly more then a minimum wage job, guess i was the fool for digging ditches and drilling concrete for 7$ an hour , when the panhandlers are prob banking like 10 an hour just standing at the corner holding a sign asking for money.

The other day some guy asked me for money because he said he needed to buy diapers for his kid and he was out of work, I told him ok. I will buy him the diapers and be right back, he said nevermind and walked off.

I prefer the bums that are atleast honest and their sign says "Need money for beer, why lie?"

 

Personally I think that there is a different story behind every homeless person and sometimes it's "There by the grace of God go I" circumstances can change the course of your life for the good or bad and how we deal with them can either make or break you, but some of it is luck in life IMO. I've been lucky and have strong mental, physical and emotional support in place, but I feel for others and understand how some things can temporally or permanently break you.