These ones are for MATACUMBIE!

Kentucky Jokes:

Did you hear about the Kentucky red neck who passed away and left his entire estate in trust for his beloved widow?
The only catch is that she can't touch it until she's 14.

How do you know when you're staying in a Kentucky hotel?
When you call the front desk and say,
"I've got a leak in my sink," and the person at the front desk says, "Go ahead."

A Kentucky State trooper pulls over a pickup truck and says to the driver,
"Got any ID?" The driver says, "'Bout what?'

Two Kentuckians are walking toward each other, and one is carrying a sack. When they meet, one says, "Hey Tommy Ray, whatcha got in th' bag?" "Jes' some chickens." "If I guesses how many they is, kin I have one?" "Shoot, if ya guesses right, I' give you both of 'em!"
"Okay......Ummmmmmm....five?"

A Kentuckian came home and found his house on fire. He rushed next door, telephoned the fire department and shouted, "Hurry over here muh house is on fahr!". "Okay," replied the fireman. "How do we get there?" "Shucks, don't you fellers still have those big red trucks?"

Billy Bob and Lester were talking one afternoon when Billy Bob tells Lester,"Ya know, I reckon I'm about ready for a vacation. Only this year I'm gonna do it a little different. The last few years, I took your suggestions as to where to go. Three years ago you said to go to Hawaii. I went to Hawaii and Betty Sue got pregnant. Then two years ago, you told me to go to the Bahamas, and Betty Sue got pregnant again. Last year you suggested Tahiti and darned if Betty Sue didn't get pregnant again." Lester asks Billy Bob, "So, what you gonna do this year that's different?" Billy Bob says, "This year I'm taking Betty Sue WITH me."

Ida Mae passed away and Bubba called 911. The 911 operator told Bubba that she would send someone out right away. "Where do you live?" asked the operator. Bubba replied, "At the end of Eucalyptus Drive." The operator asked, "Can you spell that for me?" > After a long pause, Bubba said, "How 'bout I drag her over to Oak Street and you pick her up there?"

Know why they raised the minimum drinking age in Kentucky to 32?
They wanted to keep alcohol out of the high schools.

Where was the toothbrush invented?
Kentucky. If it was invented anywhere else, it would have been called a teethbrush.

 

I like the gas chamber.

Check these out, http://www.dribbleglass.com/Jokes/redneck.htm

Steve

 

Hahaha... this one was bad:

You're probably a redneck if your family tree doesn't fork.

 

Ever watch Blue Collar Comedy Tour? Those guys are hilarious!

 

When is it on Cindy? I love stuff like that, as long as it doesn't interfere with Cops.

Steve

 

Hey Steve . . . . When were you on Cops?

 

Ugh, my name isn't Steve, it's Lonnie. I got this computer from a friend, I don't know his name or where he lives but he said I could have it.....man.

It's just my all-time favorite show.

Steve

 

Yall are hilarious!

How about a Redneck Highrise....HAHAHA

 

Down here in Alabama, when your truck breaks down...still gotta move the 4 wheeler..hahahaha!

 

Now see, that's the difference. If you saw that in Tennesse there would be a kid sitting on the four-wheeler.

I knew a guy once that drove around with a Jetski in his truck for years, it didn't run or anything, he just had it.

Steve

 

HAHAHAHAHA!!!!